July 16, 2023|כ"ז תמוז ה' אלפים תשפ"ג A Tribal Society of Trust By Rabbi Jonathan Muskat

About a year and a half ago, for my fiftieth birthday, my family gave me a birthday present, a Peloton bike and a monthly membership to Peloton. Now, a year and a half later, I’m not sure what it means when my family gives me a present, because I have been making all the down payments for the bike and I have paid the monthly membership fee for the past year and a half. But since I am making these payments, I have been pretty good at using the bike. During the school year, I try to use it three to four times per week and during the summer, I try to use it every day. But, of course, there have been stretches of time during the year when I’m either busy or tired or my knees hurt, and during these stretches of time I lost the rhythm of using the Peloton regularly and the question that I posed to myself at this time was how do I get the rhythm and routine back? I felt guilty but I wondered how can I turn my guilt into action? And I wondered should I make a “neder” or a “she-vua?” Should I make an oath that I use the Peloton three times per week? Will the oath motivate me to do it more than if I don’t make the oath? This is the famous New Year’s resolution question. How effective are New Year’s resolutions?

 

I saw a study that showed that 25% of people who make a New Year’s resolution give up by January 7^th, 46% of people keep resolutions for at least six months, and 8% keep them for the entire year. Now the 8% might seem small, but people who choose to make a New Year’s resolution are ten times as likely to keep them over those who pursue improvement in another way. And that is the tension as to the value of promises – a conflict between two values – accountability versus honesty. Making an oath, a promise or a resolution and perhaps even sharing it with someone else can provide external accountability and will increase the likelihood of doing that which I promised to do. However, Jewish tradition cares not only about how we act, but it cares about how we speak. Do we speak with honesty and integrity? Do we speak appropriately towards others? In the context of making vows, the Torah in this week’s parsha states that if we issue a vow or make an oath, “k’chol ha-yotzee mee-peev ya-aseh” – whatever we say, whatever comes out of our mouth, we should do. But the Torah also says, “lo yachel devaro” – and Rashi explains this to mean not to make our words “chullin,” or profane. Rashi is trying to tell us that our words are holy and the act of speech is a holy act. As such, if we decide to make an oath for a constructive reason, to motivate us to do something, we are balancing the two values of external accountability to achieve our goal versus the concern of a lack of honesty if we do not do that which we promised to do.

 

But do you know what’s really fascinating about the discussion of vows in the beginning of this week’s parsha? It’s the audience. This is not one of those “va-ye-daber Hashem el Moshe laymor daber el Bnei Yisrael” mitzvot, when God speaks to Moshe and tells him to instruct the Bnei Yisrael about the following mitzvah? The Torah opens this discussion with “Vayedaber Moshe el rashei ha-matot livnei Yisrael laymor zeh ha-davar asher tziva Hashem.” Moshe speaks to the rashei ha-matot, the leaders of the tribes saying that this is what God has commanded. This is the first time that the Torah tells us that Moshe instructs a mitzva specifically to the heads of the tribes. I don’t know exactly what the method of communication was for the other mitzvot at least according to the simple reading of the text. Here, there is a specific obligation to instruct the leaders of the tribes about the laws of vows and oaths and I wonder why.

 

My initial inclination is to suggest that the leaders of the tribes are leaders and role models for the people and therefore, they are specifically mentioned to not only teach the Bnei Yisrael about the power of speech, but they must also model this behavior for the people. However, if that were the case, I wonder why specifically the leaders must model the mitzvot associated with nedarim and she-vuot for the rest of the nation as opposed to any other mitzvah. What is so unique about this mitzvah that requires that the audience specifically be the tribal leaders? And, by the way, is there a difference that this mitzvah was given specifically to the rashei matot, to the tribal leaders, as opposed to the nesi-im, or leaders in general?

 

I think that there is something very unique about the title of “rashei matot,” or tribal leaders, because there is a story about tribal leaders later on in the parsha. When the two tribes of Reuven and Gad see the fertile land east of the Jordan River and want to settle there, Moshe allows them to do so provided that they send troops to help the rest of the tribes conquer the land west of the Jordan River. When Moshe agrees to this, he appoints Elazar Ha-Kohen, Yehoshua and the rashei avot ha-matot, the tribal leaders, to ensure that these two tribes keep their promise to send the troops.

 

Let me ask a basic question. Why do Bnei Yisrael have different tribes altogether? Why not just Bnei Yisrael? It’s the same question nowadays. Why do I identify as yeshivish, or modern orthodox, or open orthodox, or chassidish, or reform or conservative? Why not simply say that I’m Jewish. This is not a modern question. Thousands of years ago we could have asked the very same question. Why do you call yourself a member of Reuven’s tribe or a member of Shimon’s tribe? I don’t know if there such a thing as Shevet Reuven yeshivish or Shevet Reuven modern orthodox machmir or Shevet Reuven modern orthodox lite? But there were labels thousands of years ago. And the reason why there were labels, namely different tribes, and not simply “I am a Jew,” is that each tribe had a different philosophy or different qualities, as evidenced by the different blessings that Yaakov and Moshe offered to each tribe. And when you have different perspectives or different ideologies, like do I want to live on the western side of the Jordan River or on the eastern side of the Jordan River, and there is the potential for tension and fighting since some groups may not share the burden of conquering Eretz Yisrael, Moshe informs the leaders of each tribe that it is critical that promises are kept. It is critical that leaders in different ideological camps first and foremost ensure that they work together despite their differences, and the key to working together is making promises and establishing trust.

 

We know how dangerous tribalism can become within a nation. In 2015, President Reuven Rivlin stated that “Israeli society has become divided between four tribes,” and he listed them as secular Jews, national religious Orthodox Jews, ultra-Orthodox Haredi Jews, and Arabs. Between those tribes, Rivlin warned, there existed rising levels of “tension, fear, and hostility,” and not a shared sense of destiny. A healthy society depends on trust, honoring our promises and doing what we say we will do. Because when there is no trust, there is only fear. How could Moshe allow Reuven and Gad to remain on the eastern side of the Jordan River? What if they change their minds and decide not to send troops after he dies? What if other tribes want to live on the eastern side of the Jordan River and they say it’s not fair that they have to cross the Jordan River? The answer is that there was trust. I find that with regard to many contentious societal issues, there is often a middle ground where there is bi-partisan consensus but we don’t compromise and advocate a middle ground because we are nervous about what the other side is going to do. For example, I believe that a majority of Israelis want some amount judicial reform. Everyone is just nervous and afraid of what will happen if the status quo remains or if there is judicial reform. If there was trust between the different tribes in Israel, I believe that a deal could be achieved without all the tension and doomsday discourse.

 

This is Moshe’s message to the leaders of each tribe in the beginning of Parshat Matot, that a promise is not mere words. Lo yachel devaro – don’t profane your words. Honest speech is holy because trust is the key to creating a healthy society.  And when we do that, we imitate God. God created a holy world through speech, and we create a holy, healthy society through speech.

 

I recently have been thinking a lot about which types of politicians I should vote for or endorse. There are many, many factors that go into this decision and historically I have tended to vote for or endorse politicians who reflect my ideologies or were supportive of policies that I endorsed. Lately, I have been feeling that I should weigh more heavily which politicians promote a healthy society through their speech, through their honesty, even though some may say an honest politician is an oxymoron. At the very least, I believe that in deciding whom to vote for or endorse, I should weigh more heavily which politicians truly use best efforts to help build trust as opposed to which politicians play on our emotions through sowing feelings of fear and distrust of the “other” in our society. Remember, a vow is more than just a vow. Speech is more than mere words. Let us promote the importance of this holy value to our leaders for the benefit of our society.